Sometimes, some people will say, the moment you end a relationship with someone, you should break all the ties with them. The reason for this still baffles me a lot. So, because I’m no more dating you, I should avoid you like plaque? I should not pick your calls or reply your messages or greetings any longer? I should delete your number and block you on all social media platforms? Should I join people to say evil of him or pretend not to know him in times of need when I can really offer help? What if I need help in his area of specialisation, I should not call on him for assistance? All because we are no more dating. That to me, is the height of childishness!
For Christ sake, I once loved him; he was once a source of joy and happiness to me. He was once the reason for my existence; once a reason why I experienced true love. So, why should he be abandoned like plaque all because we no longer date? Even though the intimacy is no more there, we can still discuss and help each other once in a while when the need arises.
Some people posit that when you continue communicating with an ex, you will develop feelings for him again and this will increase the tendency of going back to the relationship. And so? Is it an abomination to go back to an ex? Do you know if your new girl or guy would be better off or miserable than your ex?
The devil you know is better than the one you don’t know. If you break up with someone and the person later tenders their genuine apologies, and you discover that they have turned off from what caused the initial break up and there are still feelings for them, why can’t you accept them back? No relationship is perfect. Relationship is a process through which you know the good, bad and ugly parts of your lover. Your duty as a lover, is to use the power of LOVE you both share to turn their ugly part to good.
If you keep dumping people after dating them for years because of some certain traits you don’t like in them, and you still proclaim the “An ex is an ex” syndrome and let “bygones be bygones” mantra, you will discover that you’re just getting older and jumping from one lover to another without any definite positive result. The reason being that no guy is perfect.
If you cannot manage a relationship, you cannot manage a man and one of your duties as a lady is to manage him. This is because your entire life revolves round a man.
ADESIYAN OLAYIWOLA OMOKEHINDE is a high school student. She resides in Ibadan and loves scribbling on relationship.